4 Types of Attachment Styles

Attachment styles are characterized by different ways of interacting and behaving in relationships. During early childhood, these attachment styles center on how children and parents interact. In adulthood, attachment styles describe attachment patterns in romantic relationships.

The concept of attachment styles grew from attachment theory and the research that emerged throughout the 1960s and 1970s. Today, psychologists typically recognize four main attachment styles: secure, ambivalent, avoidant, and disorganized.

What Is Attachment?

Attachment is a special emotional relationship that involves an exchange of comfort, care, and pleasure. The roots of research on attachment began with Freud's theories about love, but another researcher named John Bowlby is usually credited as the father of attachment theory.

John Bowlby devoted extensive research to attachment, describing it as a "lasting psychological connectedness between human beings." Bowlby shared the psychoanalytic view that early experiences in childhood are important for influencing development and behavior later in life.

In addition to this, Bowlby believed that attachment had an evolutionary component; it aids in survival. He believed that this propensity to make strong emotional bonds with specific individuals was an essential part of human nature.

Characteristics of Attachment

Bowlby believed that there are four distinguishing characteristics of attachment:

• Proximity maintenance: The desire to be near the people we are attached to.
• Safe haven: Returning to the attachment figure for comfort and safety in the face of a fear or threat.
• Secure base: The attachment figure acts as a base of security from which the child can explore the surrounding environment.
• Separation distress: Anxiety that occurs in the absence of the attachment figure.

Factors That Influence Attachment Styles

Bowlby also made three key propositions about attachment theory:

Consistent Care Leads to Trust

First, he suggested that when children are raised with confidence that their primary caregiver will be available to them, they are less likely to experience fear than those raised without such conviction.

Early Experiences are Critical

Secondly, he believed this confidence is forged during a critical development period, infancy, childhood, and adolescence. The expectations formed during that period tend to remain relatively unchanged for the rest of the person's life.

Expectations Stem from Experiences

Finally, he suggested that these expectations that are formed are directly tied to experience. In other words, children develop expectations that their caregivers will be responsive to their needs because, in their experience, their caregivers have been responsive in the past.

Ainsworth's Strange Situation Assessment

During the 1970s, psychologist Mary Ainsworth further expanded upon Bowlby's groundbreaking work in her now-famous "Strange Situation" study. The study involved observing children between the ages of 12 to 18 months responding to a situation in which they were briefly left alone and then reunited with their mother.

Based on these observations, Ainsworth concluded that there were three major styles of attachment: secure attachment, ambivalent-insecure attachment, and avoidant-insecure attachment.

Numerous studies have supported Ainsworth's conclusions and additional research has revealed that these early attachment styles can help predict behaviors later in life.

Attachment Through Life

Before you start blaming relationship problems on your parents, it is important to note that attachment styles formed during early childhood are not necessarily identical to those demonstrated in adult romantic attachments.

Those described as ambivalent or avoidant during childhood can become securely attached as adults, while those with a secure attachment in childhood can show insecure attachment patterns in adulthood. Basic temperament is also thought to play a partial role in attachment.

So what role might factors such as divorce or parental discord play in forming attachment styles? In one study, researchers found that parental divorce seemed unrelated to attachment style.

However, research in this area indicates that childhood patterns have an important impact on later relationships. The researchers also found varied beliefs about relationships amongst adults with differing attachment styles.

While we cannot say that early attachment styles are identical to adult romantic attachment, research has shown that early attachment styles can help predict behavior patterns in adulthood.

Subsequent research does suggest that parental divorce or abandonment does have an impact on adult children's attachment styles. Parental divorce or abandonment is linked to more negative feelings about romantic relationships as a higher likelihood of having an anxious and avoidant attachment style.

Secure Attachment Characteristics

Children who are securely attached generally become visibly upset when their caregivers leave and are happy when their parents return. When frightened, these children will seek comfort from the parent or caregiver.

Parents of securely attached children tend to play more with their children. Additionally, these parents react more quickly to their children's needs and are generally more responsive to their children than the parents of insecurely attached children.

Studies have shown that securely attached children are more empathetic during later stages of childhood. These children are also described as less disruptive, less aggressive, and more mature than children with ambivalent or avoidant attachment styles.

While forming a secure attachment with caregivers is normal and expected, as Hazan and Shaver have noted, it doesn't always happen. Researchers have found a number of different factors that contribute to the development (or lack thereof) of secure attachment, particularly a mother's responsiveness to her infant's needs during the first year of a child's life.

Mothers who respond inconsistently or who interfere with a child's activities tend to produce infants who explore less, cry more, and are more anxious. Mothers who consistently reject or ignore their infant's needs tend to produce children who try to avoid contact.

Secure Attachment Styles in Adults

As adults, securely attached people tend to have trusting, long-term relationships. Other key characteristics of securely attached individuals include:

• Having high self-esteem
• Enjoying intimate relationships
• Seeking out social support
• An ability to share feelings with other people

How many people classify themselves as securely attached? In a classic study by Hazan and Shaver, 56% of respondents identified themselves as secure, while 25% identified as avoidant, and 19% as ambivalent/anxious.

Ambivalent Attachment Characteristics

Children who are ambivalently attached tend to be extremely suspicious of strangers. These children display considerable distress when separated from a parent or caregiver but do not seem reassured or comforted by the parent's return.

In some cases, the child might passively reject the parent by refusing comfort or may openly display direct aggression toward the parent.

In a review of ambivalent attachment literature, Cassidy and Berlin also found that observational research consistently links ambivalent insecure attachment to low maternal availability. As these children grow older, teachers often describe them as clingy and over-dependent.

Ambivalent Attachment Styles in Adults

As adults, those with an ambivalent attachment style often feel reluctant about becoming close to others and worry that their partner does not reciprocate their feelings. This leads to frequent breakups, often because the relationship feels cold and distant.

These individuals feel especially distraught after the end of a relationship. Cassidy and Berlin described another pathological pattern where ambivalently attached adults cling to young children as a source of security.

Avoidant Attachment Characteristics

Children with avoidant attachment styles tend to avoid parents and caregivers. This avoidance often becomes especially pronounced after a period of absence.

These children might not reject attention from a parent, but neither do they seek out comfort or contact. Children with an avoidant attachment show no preference between a parent and a complete stranger.

Avoidant Attachment Styles in Adults

As adults, those with an avoidant attachment tend to have difficulty with intimacy and close relationships. These individuals do not invest much emotion in relationships and experience little distress when a relationship ends.

They often avoid intimacy by using excuses (such as long work hours) or may fantasize about other people during sex. Research has also shown that adults with an avoidant attachment style are more accepting and likely to engage in casual sex.

Disorganized Attachment Characteristics

Children with a disorganized-insecure attachment style show a lack of clear attachment behavior. Their actions and responses to caregivers are often a mix of behaviors, including avoidance or resistance.

These children are described as displaying dazed behavior, sometimes seeming either confused or apprehensive in the presence of a caregiver.

Researchers suggest that inconsistent behavior on the part of parents might be a contributing factor in this attachment style. Parents who act as figures of both fear and reassurance to a child contribute to a disorganized attachment style.

Disorganized Attachment Styles in Adults

Adults with a disorganized attachment style also exhibit a confusing mix of anxious and avoidant behaviors in relationships. They have a strong need for a close connection with a romantic partner yet struggle to open up and be vulnerable. 

People with a disorganized style may seek out a loving relationship and then suddenly push the other person away. They often sabotage their relationships and have a hard time trusting their partners. 

This style is often associated with unhealthy relationships marked by toxicity, clinginess, poor communication, and even abuse.

Take the Attachment Style Quiz

If you're unsure about your attachment style, this fast and free quiz can help you identify what your thoughts and behaviors may say about your attachment.

Takeaways

While adult romantic attachments may not exactly correspond with early childhood attachments, there is no question that our earliest relationships with caregivers play a role in development. By better understanding the role of attachment, you can gain a greater appreciation of how the earliest attachments in your life may impact adult relationships.