How to Savor Your Solitude and Get More Comfortable With Being Alone

Do you find yourself feeling overwhelmed by the hustle and bustle of daily life? In a world that never stops moving (literally), it can sometimes feel like we’re never left alone. Our phones are always buzzing with nonstop notifications, the neighborhood is alive with activity, and the house, well, it's rarely quiet there what with the kids, pets, partners, family members, or roommates.

Sometimes, the best way to find some much-needed peace is to take a step back and spend some time away from it all. A little alone time is a great way to reflect, recharge, and reconnect with ourselves.

Finding five minutes to yourself is much easier said than done, especially when you're always on the go for whatever event life throws at you next. Ahead, we explore how you can make the most of your alone time, plus dive into all the benefits of solitude.

The Benefits of Solitude

The benefits of solitude can be surprising, especially when we're used to being constantly surrounded by others. Here’s why spending time alone can actually be a good thing:

• Enables self-reflection: When we're alone, we finally have a chance to think without interruptions. It gives us space to figure out how we’re feeling, what we really want, and what’s important to us.
• Improves mental clarity: Life gets noisy, and it can be hard to think straight with constant distractions. Being alone allows us to clear out the mental clutter, helping us feel more focused and calm. We can sort through our thoughts and come out feeling refreshed.
• Recharges our energy levels: It’s natural to feel drained and burnt out after a long day of constantly interacting with people. A little alone time is the perfect way to recharge. 
• Reduces stress: Spending time alone can reduce stress and anxiety, giving the mind a chance to rest and relax, says Tatiana Rivera Cruz, MSW, LCSW, a therapist at ADHDAdvisor.
• Takes the social pressure off: Socializing often comes with pressure and expectations such as trying to make conversation or worrying about what others think. Being alone gives us a break and lets us switch off our social persona.
• Promotes independence: Spending time alone helps us get comfortable with ourselves. We start to realize that we don’t always need others to feel happy, entertained, or complete. It builds our confidence in doing things by ourselves, whether it’s going to the movies, taking a trip, or just being at home.
• Improves relationships: Paradoxically, spending time alone can actually strengthen our relationships. When we take a step back from our relationships, we often return feeling refreshed and more connected. 
• Sparks creativity: Some of our best ideas come when we’re alone. Without other people’s opinions or distractions, our minds can wander, and that’s when creativity kicks in. Whether it’s solving a problem or coming up with a new idea, solitude can spark that “aha!” moment.
• Boosts productivity: No distractions, no interruptions—that’s the magic of solitude. When we’re alone, we can focus on what we need to do and get it done faster, whether it’s work, a hobby, or even self-care.

How to Practice Solitude

Practicing solitude doesn’t have to be complicated, and it doesn’t mean cutting yourself off from the world. It’s more about intentionally carving out some alone time for yourself to recharge and reflect. 

Here are some ways to practice solitude and get more comfortable with being alone:

• Start small: If the idea of being alone feels a little daunting, start with short periods of time. Maybe it’s 10 minutes in the morning before everyone wakes up or a short walk in the evening when you get home from work. Gradually increase the time as you get more comfortable with it.
• Disconnect from your devices: Try turning off your phone, stepping away from social media, and giving yourself a break from the endless notifications. This helps create a boundary between you and the outside world, giving you uninterrupted time to recharge.
• Create a quiet space: Designate a space in your home where you can retreat for some alone time. It could be a cozy corner with a comfy chair, or a peaceful spot outside. Having a place to unwind makes the prospect more inviting.
• Take up a solo hobby: Whether it’s reading, painting, or cooking, a solo hobby gives you a chance to focus on doing something you love without distractions. It’s also a great way to unwind and tap into your creativity while enjoying your own company.
• Journal your thoughts: Journaling is a great way to spend time alone with yourself. It helps you reflect on what’s going on in your life, how you’re feeling, and what you want.
• Practice mindfulness: Activities like meditation, yoga, or even deep breathing exercises can help you focus on the present moment. They can help you connect with yourself and make solitude feel more peaceful.
• Take yourself out: Try doing activities by yourself, like going for a walk, grabbing lunch, watching a movie, or even going on a trip. Doing things you enjoy alone helps you feel more independent and empowered.
  

Signs You Need Alone Time

Sometimes, we don’t realize that we’re in desperate need of some solitude until we’re feeling totally overwhelmed. Here are some signs that it’s time to carve out some alone time.

• Experiencing social fatigue: If hanging out with people suddenly feels more exhausting than enjoyable, it's a sign that your social battery might be running low. You may find yourself craving a break from constant interaction.
• Craving peace and quiet: “The best indicator of a need for solitude is a desire for it. Do you find yourself daydreaming about time alone?” asks Otto.
• Struggling to focus: If you’re finding it hard to concentrate, feeling mentally scattered, or unable to stay on top of tasks, it may be because your brain needs time to unwind and reset.
• Feeling overwhelmed or stressed: If you're constantly feeling overwhelmed, anxious, or stressed, it might be a sign that you need a break from all your responsibilities.
• Getting easily irritated: If you get easily irritated, it may be a signal that you need to step back and recharge, says Cruz. 
• Feeling emotionally drained: If you're feeling emotionally depleted like you're constantly giving but not receiving, it's a clear signal that you need to take time for yourself. Alone time can help you refill your emotional cup.
• Feeling disconnected from yourself: If you feel like you've lost touch with your own thoughts and feelings, it’s a sign that some alone time could help you reconnect with yourself.
• Constantly seeking distractions: If you’re always looking for something to do—scrolling through social media, binge-watching shows, or filling every minute with plans—it might be a way of avoiding some much-needed alone time to process your thoughts.

Listening to these signs can lead to a healthier balance in your life, says Cruz.

Setting Boundaries

Sometimes, the demands of work, family, and social obligations make it hard to carve out time for yourself. Setting boundaries can be a game-changer, helping you cordon off some alone time. 

Here are some practical steps to help you create and protect that space:

• Communicate your needs: Let the people around you—friends, family, coworkers—know that you need time alone. Be direct but kind in explaining that you’re overwhelmed and need some alone time to relax.
• Block off time slots: Block off specific times in your schedule dedicated to being alone, just like you would for meetings or social plans. Whether it’s an hour in the morning or a day on the weekend, treat this time as non-negotiable.
• Learn to say no: It’s okay to say no to plans or commitments that overwhelm you. If you’re feeling stretched thin, politely decline invitations and explain that you need time to rest. Don’t let others guilt you into doing more than you’re willing to.
• Set time limits: When you’re spending time with friends or family, let them know in advance how long you’re available. For example, you might say, “I’m happy to catch up, but I’ll need to head home by 9 p.m. to get some rest.” Being upfront can help manage everyone’s expectations.
• Accept that some people may be unhappy: Everyone may not understand or appreciate your need for solitude. Focus on your own needs rather than worrying about their approval.

Overcoming the Stigma of Solitude

Unfortunately, the concept of solitude often has a stigma attached to it. For starters, it is often mistaken for loneliness. Furthermore, “we are socialized to think that wanting solitude means that there is something wrong with us—that we are antisocial or not skilled at making good connections,” Otto explains.

However, it’s important for us to distinguish between enjoying some alone time versus feeling lonely. Research shows us that reframing solitude as a beneficial experience can make a major difference in how we feel about it. Cultivating a mindful approach to solitude and viewing it as a form of self-care rather than isolation can help shift the conversation, says Cruz.

Here are some strategies to overcome the stigma and start enjoying alone time:

• Challenge conventional beliefs: Society often glamorizes socializing, making it seem like being constantly surrounded by people is the only way to be happy or successful. Push back against this idea by recognizing that solitude doesn’t mean you’re antisocial or lonely—it just means you value time alone to reflect, grow, and recharge.
• Focus on the benefits of solitude: Instead of worrying about how others might perceive your alone time, remind yourself of the many benefits. When you focus on how good it feels to have some time for yourself, you’ll be less likely to be concerned with what others think.
• Surround yourself with supportive people: If you feel judged for wanting alone time, it’s important to have people in your life who accept and respect your boundaries. Surround yourself with friends and family who understand that you need some downtime without making you feel guilty about it.
• Redefine alone time as empowering: Society tends to associate being alone with being lonely, but solitude can be empowering. Reframe your mindset to see alone time as a period of personal strength, self-sufficiency, and independence. By embracing solitude, you’re showing that you don’t rely on others for happiness—you can create it on your own.
• Practice self-compassion: It’s easy to fall into the trap of feeling guilty for wanting time alone, but practice being kind to yourself. Recognize that it’s perfectly normal and healthy to want some alone time.
  

Takeaways

Savoring solitude isn’t about feeling lonely—it’s about getting comfortable in your own company, recharging, and finding peace in the pause. It’s time to recognize how precious alone time is and make it a priority.