Dealing With Your Teen Who Has OCD

Teenagers can be a challenge at the best of times. However, when your teen has obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD) as well, it can present additional challenges. Teenagers with OCD may have a number of problems that can make treatment of symptoms difficult.

Treatment Refusal

Teenagers often refuse to go for assessment and treatment for OCD. This is often related to the stigma of being diagnosed with a mental illness. They may also worry about falling behind in school or have concerns about the side effects of OCD medications. In addition, like many people with OCD, your teen may have poor insight into the nature and severity of their symptoms and may not see the need to seek treatment.

How to Cope

Try to find a therapist who is skilled in motivational interviewing techniques. These are designed to help enhance motivation for change and reduce negative feelings towards treatment through education. These techniques may also help your teen gain insight into the impact of their symptoms on themselves and the people around them.

Parent Involvement in Compulsions

Many teenagers with OCD have managed to get their parents involved in their compulsions. This could involve things like helping with a cleaning ritual, agreeing to arrange items in the house a certain way, or providing excessive reassurance, like telling your teen over and over again that their hands are clean or that nothing bad will happen. This can cause burnout and frustration as parents grow tired of participating in rituals and/or continually providing reassurance for the same problems.

How to Cope

Ideally, you should have no involvement in your child's compulsions nor should you continue to provide reassurance once you have given initial feedback to your child. Participating in compulsions only reinforces their importance. Likewise, providing excessive reassurance validates the worries that accompany OCD. Many parents go along with their teen's compulsions so that their teen will not feel distressed, but it's important to realize that longterm, this does more harm than good.

Angry or Violent Behavior

Many pleasant, otherwise well-adjusted teens with OCD become very angry when prevented from carrying out an OCD ritual. In some cases, this can lead to physical confrontations between the parent and teen or the destruction of property.

How to Cope

It is important to remember that in the vast majority of cases, this anger is driven by fear, anxiety, and frustration, rather than aggression. Your teen is simply feeling overwhelmed and has run out of coping resources.

It can often be helpful to engage an objective third-party, such as an OCD therapist, who can work with your teen in a non-judgmental environment to explore the nature of their obsessions and compulsions. The therapist can then work with your teen to put coping strategies in place and work to reduce the frequency of compulsions.

Refusal to Discuss Symptoms 

Teenagers are often reluctant to share details of their lives with their parents at the best of times, and this secrecy can be even worse in teens with OCD. Symptoms of OCD can be embarrassing, particularly with respect to obsessions related to sexuality, which could involve parents, siblings, pets, or other inappropriate figures.

How to Cope

You may have to accept that your teen will not be willing to share the nature of their symptoms with you. Respecting their privacy and providing a supportive, non-judgmental environment should they decide to open up is often the most helpful strategy in these circumstances. You may suggest that if they are not comfortable speaking with you, you will help them find a therapist they are comfortable with.

Using Drugs to Cope

It is not uncommon for teens to use drugs and alcohol to cope with symptoms of OCD, particularly if their OCD symptoms are ​accompanied by depression.

How to Cope

In these circumstances, it is advisable to seek professional assistance, as this can be a complex problem that requires the experience of trained mental health professionals. Your family doctor is often a good starting point to identify resources. It can be frustrating for your child to reject such assistance, but unless they are a danger to themselves or someone else, they cannot be forced into treatment.

Being Bullied

Unfortunately, some teens with OCD are subjected to psychological and/or physical bullying. This can be extremely stressful for both parents and the affected teen and can lead to depression. Of course, depression increases the risk of self-harm behaviors, including suicide.

How to Cope

If you become aware of bullying, it is essential to engage the appropriate professionals at your teen's school, including the school principal, guidance counselor, and your child's teacher. While your teen needs to be taught assertiveness skills for dealing with such situations, they also need to feel safe and confront such problems in a supportive environment.

Individual therapy can be helpful for focusing on building self-esteem, working on social skills, and of course, managing OCD symptoms.