Moving Stress: How to Cope With Relocation

Focus on the Positives

Moving is stressful and not without challenges, but it can be helpful to focus on the positives versus dwelling on, or getting swept in, things that don’t go according to plan. 

“Regardless of the reason for your move, remind yourself that this move is necessary and will do you good,” says psychotherapist Heather Kent. “Make a list of all of the things you can look forward to, such as meeting new people, making new friends, starting a new job or career, eating new delicacies, and exploring new sights.” 

Interestingly, a 2017 study found that when people make an effort to foster positivity in their day-to-day life, they may be happier.

Prioritize Self Care

While a positive mindset can help prevent us from spiraling around negatives and mishaps, we also need to accept that our bodies and minds need rest and care. This is especially true when doing something highly stressful, such as relocating.

Schoninger says that by practicing radical self-care, we empower ourselves to deal with everything on our plate. “Self-care will only aid your ability to show up for yourself in reliable ways,” she says. “So, whatever encompasses your self-care, commit to making it a priority, as it will help prevent burnout.”

Stay Organized

Relocation often comes with a pretty heavy task load. Keeping organized during this stressful time can help you stay on task and knock out to-dos, which can reduce stress now and far along in your move.

Start by making a simple checklist that includes your overarching goals, advises Kent. From there, list small tasks underneath that you can tackle before moving day.

Consider Moving an Opportunity to Purge

Speaking of packing, there’s nothing like a big move to motivate some physical and emotional purging.

“It’s important to remember that everything you value, such as experiences, people and places, are memories that will move with you. Similarly, you can also choose to leave the painful memories that do not serve you behind in the old place that you are vacating,” says Kent.

Of course, physical “spring cleaning” frees up space for new belongings and fresh energy. It also is much easier, and often less expensive, to relocate with fewer items.

Steer Away From a Perfectionist Mindset

Moving is inherently messy and stressful. In many cases, it becomes even more challenging than we anticipated. Understanding and embracing this fact can be tremendously helpful from that very first packed box to months after moving into your new space.

“Embrace the messiness and chaos that comes with moving, rather than clinging to the idea that everything needs to be as perfect as possible,” advises Schoninger. “When you avoid the perfectionist trap, you are honoring the process of moving while modeling healthier expectations, which will open the door to things being more manageable.” 

Some levels of perfectionism can be helpful by keeping us on track. However, scientific research tells us that negative perfectionism—which involves dwelling on negatives when things don’t go to plan—can actually lead to feelings of depression and anxiety.

Maintain Existing Relationships

One of the hardest parts of relocating is moving away from your closest friends and support network. However, moving doesn’t mean that your relationships have to end.

“Long-distance relationships are much easier these days thanks to apps that allow you to text, chat with, or video-call your old friends, colleagues, and neighbors,” says Kent. “Having this kind of mindset will help reduce stress and help you get settled faster.” 

Get Out and Meet New People

Along with leaning into your existing relationships, allow yourself to engage with the local community even if you don’t feel entirely “settled” in your new city and space. 

Kent says, “Meeting new people is a part of the challenge of moving, so being available as soon as possible only helps support you. Don't worry if you don't yet have your home in order; that will always be waiting for you.”