How Snowplow Parenting Impacts Kids, According to a Psychologist

Like a snowplow clears roads by pushing snow out of the way, snowplow parenting involves removing all the difficulties and obstacles from a child’s path. This parenting style is also sometimes referred to as lawnmower parenting or bulldozer parenting.

Although the parents’ intention may be to protect their children and help them succeed, this form of parenting can have the opposite effect because it keeps children from developing critical life skills.

In this article, we explore the concept of snowplow parenting, what it looks like, how it affects children, and how to avoid it.

What Exactly Does 'Snowplow Parenting' Mean?

Snowplow parenting is a type of over-parenting, where parents are overprotective of their children and hyperfocused on their child’s lives.

The term is used to describe parents who intervene excessively in their children's lives, clearing obstacles and challenges out of their way in order to try to ensure their happiness and success.

“The experiences that are stripped away are crucial for childhood development. They help children learn important life skills, including resilience for when things don’t always go their way,” says Dr. Roeske.

Why Are So Many Parents Snowplowing?

These are some of the reasons why parents may engage in snowplow parenting:

• Overprotectiveness: Parents may be overly protective of their children and try to shield them from anything that may inconvenience or challenge them. “As a parent, it can be difficult to watch your child struggle or fail at something,” says Dr. Roeske.
• Perceived threats: Parents may view the world as a highly dangerous place for their children and try to do everything in their power to keep them safe. The 24-hour news cycle and access to other forms of digital and social media can fuel this fear.
• Personal experiences: Some parents may have had challenging or disappointing experiences in their own lives. They may try to spare their children from similar difficulties.
• Anxiety issues: Some parents may struggle with anxiety or control issues, which can cause them to micromanage their children's lives to alleviate their own fears.
• Cultural influences: Cultural norms and societal pressures can play a role in shaping parenting styles. Parents may be more likely to adopt a snowplow parenting approach if their culture prioritizes academic or professional success.
• Social competitiveness: Parents may feel compelled to ensure their children excel and outperform their peers. They may resort to this form of parenting to try and ensure their children don’t fall behind.
  

Signs of Snowplow Parenting

These are some of the signs and characteristics of snowplow parenting:

• Doing everything for the child: The parent may choose to do everything for the child instead of letting them learn to become independent. The parent may use the justification that it’s faster or easier to do something themselves, rather than teaching their child to do it properly, says Dr. Roeske.
• Micromanaging the child’s life: The parent may control and micromanage the child’s schedule and activities, without leaving much room for the child to explore their own interests, make decisions about their schedule, or learn to organize and manage things themselves.
• Being overly protective of the child: The parent may be excessively protective of the child and not allow them to do age-appropriate activities for fear of putting them at risk.
• Being excessively involved in the child’s life: The parent may be excessively involved in the child’s life, to the extent that they may try to make all their decisions for them. They may never give the child a chance to do something or decide something for themselves.
• Clearing all obstacles from the child’s way: The parent may try to do every task and fight every battle on behalf of their child, instead of letting the child learn how to do things for themselves to solve their own problems.
• Shielding the child from consequences: The parent may shield the child from the consequences of their actions by making excuses or justifications for their behavior instead of encouraging them to take responsibility.

Examples of Snowplow Parenting

These are some examples of snowplow parenting:

• Not letting children do age-appropriate activities that other children are doing, such as taking the bus or walking home from school once they’re old enough.
• Doing a child’s homework for them instead of letting them do it on their own or showing them how to do it.
• Not letting the child do chores, manage logistics, or learn important skills.
• Intervening in the child’s disagreements with authority figures such as teachers or coaches and defending the child no matter what the circumstances.
• Getting involved in the child’s disagreements with their friends instead of letting them sort things out on their own.
• Pressuring the child’s teachers to give them higher grades or going to great lengths to secure college admissions for the child, to try to help them succeed.

Snowplow parenting can persist beyond childhood and into adulthood. For example, Dr. Roeske says parents may call their adult child to make sure they wake up on time, schedule doctor’s appointments or oil changes for them, or continue to support them financially well into adulthood.

Mental Health Impact of Snowplow Parenting

Snowplow parenting can provide short-term success and stress-relief for the child, says Dr. Roeske. He explains that this is because a snowplow parent may be successful at helping their child get better grades, make a competitive sports team, avoid detention, get into college, or achieve other accomplishments.

However, snowplow parenting can have adverse effects on the child’s long-term growth and development. These are some of the ways it can affect children, according to Dr. Roeske:

• Lack of autonomy: Since the child is used to having everything done for them, they may struggle with autonomy, self-sufficiency, decision-making, and problem-solving when they grow up.
• Learned helplessness: The child may become reliant on others’ support and be unable to navigate challenges independently, resulting in learned helplessness.
• Difficulty regulating emotions: The children may not be able to regulate their emotions when something negative happens to them because they have never been exposed to any form of distress, pain, or failure. The world won’t always cater to the child and they don’t have the coping skills for when disappointment happens.
• Anxiety: When the parent makes decisions based on anxious concerns, they act in ways that are designed to reduce fear, instead of teaching their child how to manage challenging situations, develop coping skills, and increase resiliency. As a result, they may pass their anxiety along to their child.
• Entitlement: Snowplow parenting can lead to a sense of entitlement in the child, as they may come to expect constant assistance and preferential treatment.

Helicopter Parenting vs. Snowplow Parenting 

Snowplow parenting is not to be confused with helicopter parenting (also known as drone parenting), which is another form of over-parenting.

While helicopter parenting involves “hovering,” or keeping a close eye on a child's every move, snowplow parenting typically involves more direct intervention with a parent taking control and actually doing things for their children, says Dr. Roeske. “A helicopter parent watches closely as their child does their homework. A snowplow parent actually does the homework for the child.”

These are some of the differences between the two types of parenting.

How to Avoid Snowplow Parenting 

These are some strategies that can help you avoid snowplow parenting:

• Allow age-appropriate activities: Let your child engage in age-appropriate tasks and activities. It may take them a few tries to figure out how to do something but be patient and teach them how to do it. 
• Promote independence: Let your child learn how to do things by themselves. You can show them how to do it, but avoid taking over the task and doing it for them. Dr. Roeske says you can keep boundaries to keep them safe, but give them the freedom to make their own decisions.
• Encourage problem-solving: Encourage your child to tackle problems and think of solutions on their own, instead of taking over the situation and fixing everything for them, says Dr. Roeske. You can offer guidance if needed, but let them take the lead.
• Teach resilience: Let your children experience failure and disappointment. Use these moments as opportunities to teach them how to cope and be resilient. 
• Lead by example: Dr. Roeske recommends leading by example and demonstrating positive responses to stressful situations. This will help your child learn how to cope with difficult situations.
• Offer emotional support: Offer emotional support and validation when your child is dealing with something difficult. Empathize with them without trying to step in and fix everything for them.
• Avoid shielding them from consequences: Teach your child to take responsibility for their mistakes. Avoid shielding them from the consequences of their actions. Letting consequences happen naturally can help the child learn from the situation, says Dr. Roeske.
• Give them room to grow and learn: Resist the urge to intervene in every aspect of your child's life. Give them space to learn, grow, and make mistakes. Let them have some autonomy over their choices and actions.
• Trust them: Showing trust in your child's abilities and decisions will help boost their self-confidence.